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Whilst Dunoon ferries have been in the news a lot recently, its not the recent decision about passenger-only services that got me thinking this week. If you want to know more about that, go to the Dunoon Observer page

Instead it was a trip on a Western Ferry yesterday that had me pondering change and how we respond to things around us.

With the strong winds this week, there was a bit of a swell running across our track and so the ferry was rolling a bit. Stood inside, I was watching the waves break away from us, heading  towards the fog-shrouded shore at Cove. After a few moments I became aware that the glass was almost against my face! Had I been overbalancing, swaying with the rhythm, entering a wave-induced trance? No, I was still standing upright in relation to the waves and the horizon. Instead, it was the boat moving under me causing the glass to move back and forth.

This then brought me back to thinking about the phrase in the title which has been quoted frequently during my NLP training course (for information on what NLP is, checkout Sugar NLP's definition here), "You can't not change". Even though I was standing still, because the environment was changing around me I was having to adapt to my immediate surroundings. I was doing it almost subconsciously as I looked at the horizon.

How often is that true of us in other places? Things change around us but we don't want to be different so we try to remain the same as we were last week or last year. The very act of sticking to the model though will require change! I was working with young people earlier in the week who experienced some challenging activities and consequently changed their view of what they were capable of. They could however have chosen to ignore the facts in front of them and held to their previous views that they couldn't do it. That would also have been a change though; deliberately reinforcing a negative view of themselves by ignoring evidence to the contrary. It sounds daft but yet many people still do it regularly.

So as you look at things altering around you, and feel some of that change inside, what do you do about it? Are you reacting really well to differences or is your subconscious doing what it thinks you need without asking you if that's what you want? What thoughts are going through your head even as you are reading these words?

Even if you don't feel the need to make big changes, people say that talking to a coach is a good way of coming to terms with the status quo. You could get in touch for an exploratory chat to see how much of a difference it will make for you.

 

You are not lost

05/02/2010

 
Stand still. The trees ahead and bushes beside you
Are not lost. Wherever you are is called Here,
And you must treat it as a powerful stranger,
Must ask permission to know it and be known.
The forest breathes. Listen. It answers,
I have made this place around you.
If you leave it, you may come back again, saying Here.
No two trees are the same to Raven.
No two branches are the same to Wren.
If what a tree or a bush does is lost on you,
You are surely lost. Stand still. The forest knows
Where you are. You must let it find you.

One of my friends introduced this to me on a RYLA course last year and the idea of the trees not being lost became a bit of a theme for the week. I keep coming back to it because of the memories but also so many good concepts in it.
  • How often do we run around so madly trying to do so many things when actually what we need is to stop. But instead we run in ever decreasing circles until we acknowledge that we have seen these trees before and that the edge of the forest is no closer than 20 minutes ago when we were last here.
  • Even if Ents are merely fictional (aren't they?) the great age and stature of some trees implies a wisdom of years and experience that far outstrips mine. They have seen more than me throughout time and maybe they know more than me.
  • Lost are they who don't appreciate the beauty of nature. It was a delight to get talking to someone in the heart of busy Glasgow yesterday who had a heart for the outdoors.
Next time you see a stand of trees, take 30 seconds to stop. And listen.

'Lost' by David Wagoner, from the book "Traveling Light: Collected and New Poems" published by the University of Illinois Press in 1999