Working with clients this week who were doing some introductory climbing and abseiling, I was struck by how willing they were for me to exhort them to greater efforts, to put them in scary situations and to actively push them, although rarely physically, to bigger and better achievements.

This then made me wonder, how willing are people to be pushed? Do we normally want to be challenged - if we thought about it most of us would say 'of course'. Without some form of challenge or excitement, life can become dull and boring - we thrive on a little bit of stress. Baz Luhrman suggested that we should do one thing every day that scares us but we can easily ignore the advice and lapse into cosy routines that bob along from one day to the next.

So who do we empower to push us beyond our comfort zone? If you look round at your circle of friends and regular acquaintances, how many of them have your permission to say hard things to you, to be critical or  to set you targets that will be hard to reach? What gives them that right? Have you explicitly asked them to, or is it simply a feature of a long term, trusting relationship - you know that they have your future best interests at heart so you wilingly forgive them for trying to make your life a little harder in the hear and now?

If you can think of no-one who goads you and motivates you to go that little bit further then stop now and make a plan to find someone to assist you because however much you think you can push yourself, there will always be times when someone else will do it better. When you simply want to relax into a rut of easyness, even if just for a short time, who can you find who will challenge that mindset? Maybe its time to look for a life coach who will hold you accountable, who will challenge your procrastination and 'I'll do it next week' mentality, thereby helping you to reach your goals now, instead of 'sometime in the future'.

Maybe though, you read the title and thought it spoke of someone else forcing you to go where you don't want to, making you work harder than you want, not a friend but a foe. Are you struggling to meet the demands placed on you? If so, its maybe time to look for a way out, a change that takes you away from the pusher, however you choose to make that happen. Again maybe life coaching can be an answer, but there are other options. Simply gaining some more assertiveness might make a difference but so would punching his lights out. Please note I only recommend one of these options, although there are numerous more that could be pursued.

Ultimately though, the question comes down to 'how far do I want to go?' or maybe rephrased as 'how much do I want to achieve?' which needs to be answered before you think about people helping to push you there.